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Pretty much everything in my life right now is a seizure trigger.
- diet (fast food, dairy, wheat)
- alcohol (not often, but often enough)
- illness (upper respiratory infection)
- medicine (I did miss one day recently, so that isn't helping)
- light/sound (I stare at three computer monitors all day, one of which is made of 16 tiny screens, listen to a repeating soundtrack of elevator music, am alerted to sounds like alarms on doors and telephones ringing)
- the biggie, stress
A lot of these can be changed. Alcohol is not an important part of my life; neither is fast food. However, a lot of people have made improvements by cutting out dairy and wheat, which are two pretty big staples in my diet (since I don't eat much in the way of fruits and veggies, I have to eat SOMETHING). This would need to be evaluated. I will get healthy eventually, and through dosing or a doctor change, I will get back on full medication.
Lights and sounds are every day issues that my body either needs to accommodate or be medicated to handle. If this job is truly too... "high risk" for me at this time, then [here comes the OCD cycle thinking] I need to look into disability. Honestly, with an English major and this economic climate, every job available to me involves a computer screen.
As for stress, a lot of this involves finding long-term solutions. At this point in the league, we are building the entire future, not just this month. While I'm creating the website, I will be preventing myself from doing the same work a month from now. So this immense stress now won't be on me later.. and while that doesn't help now, it will be beneficial then. This will also help in future bouts, future skater relations.. all of which can potentially be more hands-off. Not awesome now, awesome later.
Another issue that has come to mind today, while seizing up more than once an hour, is whether this will interfere with roller derby. Of course I need to report what is happening to the training committee, but unless things get worse, this situation can only harm myself. I freeze on the track, am dazed for a moment... perhaps my team misses a point or a crucial block. Isn't that better than missing a player? After all, I have already played a scrimmage while phasing in and out, and the worst that happened was a big fall (and I'm sure that was more on account of inexperience than any malfunction). In any case, I need to be aware of my body's ability and stop denying to myself that this is happening.
If it means I have to skip work and get a ride to St Louis, I may have to keep that appointment. I hate to think that is the option.
- diet (fast food, dairy, wheat)
- alcohol (not often, but often enough)
- illness (upper respiratory infection)
- medicine (I did miss one day recently, so that isn't helping)
- light/sound (I stare at three computer monitors all day, one of which is made of 16 tiny screens, listen to a repeating soundtrack of elevator music, am alerted to sounds like alarms on doors and telephones ringing)
- the biggie, stress
A lot of these can be changed. Alcohol is not an important part of my life; neither is fast food. However, a lot of people have made improvements by cutting out dairy and wheat, which are two pretty big staples in my diet (since I don't eat much in the way of fruits and veggies, I have to eat SOMETHING). This would need to be evaluated. I will get healthy eventually, and through dosing or a doctor change, I will get back on full medication.
Lights and sounds are every day issues that my body either needs to accommodate or be medicated to handle. If this job is truly too... "high risk" for me at this time, then [here comes the OCD cycle thinking] I need to look into disability. Honestly, with an English major and this economic climate, every job available to me involves a computer screen.
As for stress, a lot of this involves finding long-term solutions. At this point in the league, we are building the entire future, not just this month. While I'm creating the website, I will be preventing myself from doing the same work a month from now. So this immense stress now won't be on me later.. and while that doesn't help now, it will be beneficial then. This will also help in future bouts, future skater relations.. all of which can potentially be more hands-off. Not awesome now, awesome later.
Another issue that has come to mind today, while seizing up more than once an hour, is whether this will interfere with roller derby. Of course I need to report what is happening to the training committee, but unless things get worse, this situation can only harm myself. I freeze on the track, am dazed for a moment... perhaps my team misses a point or a crucial block. Isn't that better than missing a player? After all, I have already played a scrimmage while phasing in and out, and the worst that happened was a big fall (and I'm sure that was more on account of inexperience than any malfunction). In any case, I need to be aware of my body's ability and stop denying to myself that this is happening.
If it means I have to skip work and get a ride to St Louis, I may have to keep that appointment. I hate to think that is the option.
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