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Jun. 8th, 2010 08:38 pm
On Lady Gaga
In honor of the video for Alejandro being released today, I decided to watch every Gaga video out there, most for the first time.
As a result, I have some figures.
Best make out with a chick: Love Game vs. Telephone. Love Game has the downfall of being a song both 1) about a game and 2) being a video filled with dudes and crotch/dick grabbing, but the two moments of girlkissing are unexpected and pretty darn hot. Telephone, while sapphicly charged, didn't entirely deliver on the girlsmooching front. Gaga just didn't seem into it. Perhaps she was busy thinking about her Honey Bee.
Best Gaga Breast: Telephone (Jail) vs. Alejandro (Guns) vs. Alejandro (Bikini). This is a difficult choice. Obviously, I favor later-Gaga. As much as Sparkly!Jail Gaga makes me want to be shoved up against some bars, and Gun!Bikini Gaga makes me want to be a target, I think I'm going to have to go with Nude!Bikini Gaga, for the sheer (pun!) breath-snatching (another pun!) factor.
Lowest budget, obviously: Poker Face. This was almost painful to watch. She looks incredibly young, and obviously the director didn't quite know what to do with her.
Best Death: Paparazzi (Skarsgard) vs. Paparazzi (Gaga) vs. Telephone (Tyrese) vs. Bad Romance (Skeletor). I think the verdict goes to Tyrese. Choking on breakfast food is pretty awesome, plus Beyonce then delivers that line about her honey. Nommm.
Best use of chandeliers and polar bears, obviously: Bad Romance. I don't even know.
Best use of Italian stereotypes: Eh, Eh. I didn't even know this was released as a single, let alone made a video. I couldn't bear to sit through the whole thing. Good luck if you try.
Random favorite moment from Beautiful, Dirty Rich: Gaga's hand pressed against a girl's throat. Um, wow.
Waste of a seizure: Video Phone. The set up with guys' heads as cameras was almost going to be a statement, but I guess I expected too much. Fail.
Best Gaga Outfit: First of all, this is an impossible category. I'm going to limit it to the videos, because otherwise there is a limitless material to draw from, and material that I simply haven't observed. Judgement is based on WHOLE look, including shoes, hair, makeup, any accessories... and of course the clothes.
... Okay, I'm a minimalist, and I can't decide, so. I'm just going to say the nude bikini with black stockings from Alejandro. It's understated, and I love her hair with that look.That, or the gun boobs.
As a result, I have some figures.
Best make out with a chick: Love Game vs. Telephone. Love Game has the downfall of being a song both 1) about a game and 2) being a video filled with dudes and crotch/dick grabbing, but the two moments of girlkissing are unexpected and pretty darn hot. Telephone, while sapphicly charged, didn't entirely deliver on the girlsmooching front. Gaga just didn't seem into it. Perhaps she was busy thinking about her Honey Bee.
Best Gaga Breast: Telephone (Jail) vs. Alejandro (Guns) vs. Alejandro (Bikini). This is a difficult choice. Obviously, I favor later-Gaga. As much as Sparkly!Jail Gaga makes me want to be shoved up against some bars, and Gun!Bikini Gaga makes me want to be a target, I think I'm going to have to go with Nude!Bikini Gaga, for the sheer (pun!) breath-snatching (another pun!) factor.
Lowest budget, obviously: Poker Face. This was almost painful to watch. She looks incredibly young, and obviously the director didn't quite know what to do with her.
Best Death: Paparazzi (Skarsgard) vs. Paparazzi (Gaga) vs. Telephone (Tyrese) vs. Bad Romance (Skeletor). I think the verdict goes to Tyrese. Choking on breakfast food is pretty awesome, plus Beyonce then delivers that line about her honey. Nommm.
Best use of chandeliers and polar bears, obviously: Bad Romance. I don't even know.
Best use of Italian stereotypes: Eh, Eh. I didn't even know this was released as a single, let alone made a video. I couldn't bear to sit through the whole thing. Good luck if you try.
Random favorite moment from Beautiful, Dirty Rich: Gaga's hand pressed against a girl's throat. Um, wow.
Waste of a seizure: Video Phone. The set up with guys' heads as cameras was almost going to be a statement, but I guess I expected too much. Fail.
Best Gaga Outfit: First of all, this is an impossible category. I'm going to limit it to the videos, because otherwise there is a limitless material to draw from, and material that I simply haven't observed. Judgement is based on WHOLE look, including shoes, hair, makeup, any accessories... and of course the clothes.
... Okay, I'm a minimalist, and I can't decide, so. I'm just going to say the nude bikini with black stockings from Alejandro. It's understated, and I love her hair with that look.
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